#Airportthoughts

I love seeing the world and learning about new cultures. What I don't like is actual travel. Like sitting on a plane for HOURS. I take books, iPads, watch movies, sleep and of course drink but I still am bored AF. Sometimes I wish a hottie (or a cutie) or a man who has good breath would be seated next to me and makes me a member of the mile high club...oooo a girl can dream. #airportthoughts

RAGE...I sit and wait and wait to be boarded like cattle. Next to me a crying child. Just give him the damn iPad I pray to a God I I don;t believe is listening. If she were, she would do something about this woman next to me with shoes off that are uncomfortably close. It's only an 8 hour flight you say. Great. FML. #airportthoughts

No I will not trade my aisle for your middle so you can sit next to your boyfriend...I DONT CARE.#airportthoughts

Are we F**Ki*& there YET?!? #duh

 

 

 

SS: A Tokyo Love Story

I met him on Tinder with one and only one thing on my mind.

I've often wondered when I became attracted to their culture. True, I loved their food but was that/is that enough? Was it the mild soft-spoken manner in comparison to my loud boisterous one? Their delicate frame to my solid dancer's build with a bunch of midwestern meat and tater's over my belt? Or was it that they too have flawless anti-aging skin? True, "Black don't crack" but "Asian don't raisin". The Japanese skin regime is on point. And he was no different. Also, there was his hair...he was in his early 40's and has a full thick luscious head of hair. The times I have stroked that hair, GOD, the times I've pulled that hair. The beautiful babies we would have made.

I had it planned. It was to be one night and one night only. So different from my other Sabbatical Smooches stories as I was gonna try for a little bit more than smooch.  

He was sweet, soft-spoken, and while English was not his strong point, he had something quietly sensual about him.

He... was the one, and surprisingly he knew of the perfect love hotel. Hence, the adventure began.

 

Taking Chances...Part 2,923,309,434,343 ....

The kick-off of my birth month was a treat. And not an apple pie and vanilla ice cream kind of treat either...It a was sinful, decadent, sexy, shop-filled and gastronomical delights all in one...  Italy. It was perfection. 

I flew into Rome on a Sunday morning. Hopped the train from the airport to the city, checked my bag and walked for a bit. Destination: Breakfast and the Trevi Fountain. Trevi Fountain Tidbit: There is a belief that if you go to the fountain and throw in a coin you will return to Rome. Well, the first time I was in Rome was five years ago and I did just that, and here I was back in Rome so it must have worked.  Near the fountain, Lexie made a new friend.

The afternoon flew by, and soon we were off to our next destination:

Rome was just port of entry the real fun was to begin in Florence.

Rome was just port of entry the real fun was to begin in Florence.

Italian men are handsome, and make me h---yAF! It's been five years since I'd been to Florence, but nothing has changed. They are still sexy and it felt like home. I wanted  to have sex with all of them. The whole city. Well, the whole city over the age of 30 and under the age of 50.

Florence was about wine, food, fun, and frolic. My first night was filled with all of these plus a late night Vespa tour of the city that ended with me kissing on the sexiest men I've ever met. That was the kind of night that RomComs are made of. (more of this story in the book)

I spent my days walking the cobble-lined streets, shopping, eating and drinking my way around town. It was amazing.

Florence was so short but what was even shorter, however, one of the most perfect parts of the trip: Milano!!!!!

First, I have to amend my earlier statement about the age requirements on men I'm interested in 35-50 does not work in Milan. Mainly because ALL the men are gorgeous. Seriously, made me consider dating men in their 20's all the way up to 75. The men are too much.  If that isn't enough to make a girl swoon, it's Milan! The fashion capital of the world.

 I stayed in a delightful Airbnb which was adorable. I had lunch, (a light yummy margarita pizza)

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then went on my main mission. To shop until I dropped...some cash. I went to a (read: THE) vintage store: Vintage Delirium. Click on the link because the store is classic. Better yet if in Milan go to the store in person. So freaking worth it. I found the most beautiful dual tone leather travel bag, a 1940 back and white dress, and a 1980's brooch that would make Patti LaBelle's voice go up yet another octave, sunglasses and more.

Next up, evening cocktails. I mean I can't be a lady who lunches, shops till she drops and then not complete with a cocktail..how uncivilized. I went to one of the world's top 50 bars...Nottingham Forrest.

This place was lovely, the service was quick and attentive, everything was edible and the drinks were STRONG. I barely got thru the first one, but I did it. (check out picks below. It's a slide show so just click and the next pic will cycle through...five in total)

This birth year for me is about re-birth. It's scary, new, different but I am embracing every minute. Check back in a week or so when I go on my end of the month birth trip, becuase why the fuck not?

I travel to see the world, but also that I can be seen. 

 

 

 

 

 

Penises, and Penii and Penes...A Love Story

Some days you walk along the beach and you see something that makes you stop and say, "Hmmm, that's different" then there are things that make you say "What kind of foolishness is going on here"?

Are these what I think they are?

Are these what I think they are?

Currently, I am in Krabi, Thailand at Phra Nang Beach which got it's name and plethora of penises, (or would it be Penii, or Penes? You choose) in a legendary way. A way so legendary that there are numerous tales.  It begins with Phra Nang (or Mae Nang) who is a female spirit symbolizing fertility. Part of the cave looks a tad like a vajayjay (like for reals), with a mountain of phallic symbols ranging from inches to several feet tall and some wide. Local fishermen believe that offering a phallic symbol will result in a hefty catch. Most Thais who visit make it a point to pay their respects to Phra Nang.

The one I was told by a local was thatPhraNang was an Indian princess who was killed in a shipwreck. Another, she was the wife of a fisherman who was lost at sea, and spends the her days in the cave, awaiting her husbands return, but my favorite was:

She was the lone woman on an island of many men, and they all wanted a wife and procreate yet there was only one woman. So all the men fought and killed each other for her. The shrine represents all the men that died for the love of this one woman.

Now I don't know about you, but I think this makes her one bad chick.

Today, local fisherman and boatmen leave offerings to ensure safe travels on the sea, in the form of male genitalia- the cave is covered in various "linga" or phallic shaped statues. And trust the ones in the cave are EXTREMELY realistic and lifelike from the head to the shaft and the ridges too.

Definitely, something you don't see on your daily commute. Or maybe you do. I don't know your life.

Check back for more pics and stories. I haven't posted tons over the last few months as I have been stateside but now...I'm back! Until the next post I leave you with kinda dick pics. OMG I'm as bad as Anthony Weiner. (click below to see the pics...total of five)

Pics of the cave

xo

K (and Lexie)

 

Sabbatical Smooches: Once Upon A Train Platform...Pisa, Italy

On a September afternoon, I decided to take a train from the beautiful Florence to Pisa, in order to see the leaning tower. I met my buddy at the station and we took the train together.  Hilarity ensued (in my mind):

Afterwards, we had a slice of pizza and walked back to the train headed for Florence. At the platform I see a man who made my stomach flip flop...he was tall, with dark olive baked skin and sexy AF. I wanted to do all kinds of dirty yet delicious things to this cutie. He was also rolling what I thought was a cigarette. My friend L said, "no, that's marijuana Kit".

SCORE!

"Really?" I replied. Then continue to look at him until we made contact. It took eons for him to look my direction, but once we locked eyes. It was GAME ON!  The moment he looked at me was more magical than a movie moment...the moment when two star crossed lovers meet and you can't wait to see what happens next. The minute our eyes locked I begin to hear the music..not some sweet birds whistling or enchanting love song but the sounds of dark, funky boom chicka wow wow.  Today was about to be a VERY good day.

Side note: There MUST be something about the water in Italy, everyone: from babies to 80-year-olds are breathtakingly gorgeous. Even the street dogs are adorable. However I digress.

First, he was NOT Italian. I was shocked, as he was so pretty, sexy AF, a hot and spicy number named Eduardo, from Spain.  A student working on his masters of art in Florence, with a love of geography. He was 25 maybe 26 years old. We chatted for a bit as he rolled a spliff. We talked about politics, Spain, travel and of course Italy.

The three of us sat and laughed and watched two trains come and go as we took a moment to relax and take in the culture. While chatting he began to give me an overview of Italy. Instead of using an actual map he used my body.

Granted Siclly is far north, so it was quite boring, however things got a bit heated by the time he hit Naples, and I had to remind him we were in public. Florence...forget about it I was ready for a kiss and then some...

The next train was approaching and he asks me to come with him. I explain that I'm headed back to Florence with my friend and can't....he looks at me with the darkest deepest brown eyes and I gave him my hand. He tasted like beer and smelled like a man. It was intoxicating. 

The train pulled into the station. It was packed. He pulled me onto the train and we scour from car to car in search of a seat,  stopping along the way for me to do my research. Meaning I stole a kiss and then some.

Where was I going? Who is this man? Is this a good or a bad idea? So many questions...the answers can be found in my book coming this Winter.

Sabbatical Smooches: Collecting Kisses Around the Globe.